As humans, we tend to focus on what we lack. God has asked us to give thanks every day, and to be grateful in all things. This is a gift to us to help us overcome our natural tendency to focus on what we lack. Bob Goff said, “We are not held back by what we don’t have. We are held back by what we do have and don’t use.”
One way to bloom is to look around and ask yourself, “What do I have that I’m not using?”
My grandmother, Lenore Bennion, told me, “Happiness is not getting what you want. Happiness is doing your duty and being glad.”
One way to bloom is to ask yourself good questions that lead to gladness.
“Why?” is generally a terrible question. e.g. “Why is my house always so messy?” “Why are things so hard right now?”
Instead ask “How?” or “What?” questions:
How can I get my work done and have fun at the same time?
What can I do to laugh a lot today?
How can I make today better than yesterday?
What can I do to show my boss that I am the best person for this job?
Another way to bloom is to recognize your true value.
On a Sunday morning in January, six years ago, I stayed home from church with my 2-year-old twins, who were both feverish. As I sat on the couch snuggling them, I felt suddenly an awe that my presence was what they wanted most. They were miserable, and they just wanted me. It’s incredible, really. All the things I constantly criticize myself for, they didn’t care about. They didn’t care that I needed to lose 40 pounds. They didn’t care that I wasn’t wearing makeup or dressed in trendy clothes. They didn’t care that the dinner I fixed the night before was hasty and lacked vegetables. They didn’t care that I hadn’t mopped the floor yet. They just wanted me.
“You never know how much good you do. …You are doing the best you can, and that best results in good to yourself and to others. Do not nag yourself with a sense of failure. Get on your knees and ask for the blessings of the Lord; then stand on your feet and do what you are asked to do. Then leave the matter in the hands of the Lord. You will discover that you have accomplished something beyond price. ~Gordon B Hinkley To the Women of the Church 2003
As we bloom and grow, we can recognize that growing is not always easy. Growth means change, and change can be scary and uncomfortable. If life feels hard- that’s good! That means you are learning and changing!
“It might be hard at first or always. “If for a while the harder you try, the harder it gets, take heart. So it has been with the best people who ever lived.”
―Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, “The Inconvenient Messiah”
Another way to bloom is to spend time on something you are good at. Always setting goals to work on what you are bad at can get discouraging. Work on something that brings you joy! Heavenly Father gave you gifts for a reason.
1 Timothy 4:14 Neglect not the gift that is in thee, which was given thee by prophecy, with the laying on of the hands of the presbytery (elders).
The same principle applies to service. You don’t always need to know what is most needed, you can serve out of the abundance of what brings you joy. We feel inadequate because we are. Let control of the outcome. Bring your little basket of loaves and fish to the Savior’s feet and let Him multiply them. We bloom when we serve others from the joy that overflows out of our hearts.
When we are going through hard things, it can be easy to think that God has forgotten us, that he is not nearby. But the scriptures show us a different picture.
Jacob chapter 5:21-22
And it came to pass that the servant said unto his master: How comest thou hither to plant this tree, or this branch of the tree? For behold, it was the poorest spot in all the land of thy vineyard.
And the Lord of the vineyard said unto him: Counsel me not; I knew that it was a poor spot of ground; wherefore, I said unto thee, I have nourished it this long time, and thou beholdest that it hath brought forth much fruit.
The Lord knows where you are planted, he knows the difficulty of your ground, and he is nourishing you. He knows what is good for you and for your family.
“So keep loving. Keep trying. Keep trusting. Keep believing. Keep growing. Heaven is cheering you on today, tomorrow, and forever.”
―Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, “Tomorrow the Lord Will Do Wonders Among You”
Marvelous Pigs in Satin 