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Because Twins- Part 2

29 Apr

So I think the best thing about being pregnant with twins is that when well-meaning strangers say to me

“Wow! You are huge!  Are you sure you aren’t having twins?  You look like you are about to pop!”

I can say, “Actually I am having twins.”

I get huge with every pregnancy.  My guess is that because I’m short-waisted, the baby has nowhere to go but out.    So by the time I am 6-7 months pregnant, I get comments like the above every day from just about everyone who lays eyes on me.  Or the comment’s cousin:

“Wow! You are huge!  Are you due, like, tomorrow?”

I plaster a stiff smile on my face and say, ” No I actually have 8 weeks left.”

Then I inwardly cringe at the look of horror that crosses their face, clearly they are sure my skin will give way much before then, and I will explode.

 I often wonder why people think it’s okay to inform a pregnant woman that she is the most horrifyingly huge thing they’ve ever beheld.  As if maybe she hasn’t noticed that she’s put on weight?  

I always want to say “Thanks for pointing out that I look like a hippo, that really made my day.” 

There is this very nice man that goes to my church who commented on how huge I was two Decembers ago when I was 8 1/2 months pregnant with Baby Bean.  I think he was trying to be funny.  To this day, when I see him, I feel a twinge of intense dislike.  It surprises me, because that’s pretty rare for me to not like a person–especially someone who is really a very nice person.  The hormones burnt my emotional reaction to his “great with child” comment into my brain forevers.  An elephant never forgets.

It’s a bad idea to insult a pregnant woman.  

I suggest you even stay away from adjectives like “majestic” because they imply largeness.

Trust me, a woman who has put on 25-30-60 pounds in the last 8 months is not unaware of the fact.  Nor is she unaware of how uncomfortable she feels or how moving at all is difficult and sometimes painful.  Last time she was getting out of the shower and caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror, she was momentarily frightened (“Dear Goodness! What is that huge pink thing?”) before she realized it was herself.

The only comment I hate more is “Haven’t you had that baby yet?”

Hello!  Would I be here looking swollen and miserable if I had?  Saying this to a pregnant woman who is past her due date will incite murderous feelings within her breast.  I would not vouch for your safety.  Lock your doors while you sleep.  Better yet, keep that comment to yourself.

This time around, when people comment on how huge I am, I can say

“I’m having twins, that’s why.”

And maybe I’ll feel less like its me that is huge.  Because really, it’s the babies, and I do want them to be huge, healthy babies.

Because Twins- part 1

27 Apr

twins

I’ve only known since March 20.  Only for a little over a month.  But it feels like months and months– a year.

We will be having twins this summer.

Identical boys.

This is my 8th pregnancy and until a month ago, I thought I had this pregnancy thing down.  Everything is different this time around.

Doctor visits are a lot more exciting/intense.  Normal pregnancy visits are about 10 minutes long.  I step on a scale, pee in a cup, have my blood pressure taken, tell the doctor that I don’t have any unusual symptoms.  He tells me everything looks great, listens to the baby’s heart beat and says, “see you in a month, keep drinking water and taking care of yourself.”  I smile and nod.

This time around, I get new information every visit.

“Because of the high chance that you will need a Cesarean Section, you will deliver in an operating room.  Also, your gestational diabetes will be worse this time around, you may even need insulin.  Also, we will do several more ultrasounds to check on the growth of the babies during the pregnancy.”

or

or “Baby A’s femur is measuring short.  This might indicate a chromosome disorder, but it is what we call a ‘soft sign’ and everything else looks totally fine. It could be just a measurement error.  We will definitely measure again on the next ultrasound.”

or

“It looks like the twins are sharing a placenta.  That puts the babies at risk for Twin-to-Twin Transfusion Syndrome.  I’m not worried, and you shouldn’t be either.  But to be prepared, we’ll have you visit the high-risk doctor and have another ultrasound and see what he thinks.”

Then there is just the extra suspense of looking all around with the little doppler thingy to find 2 baby heartbeats instead of just 1.  Twin B is super wiggly and hard to pin down.

Last of all my doctor asks me, “What questions do you have?”

I generally don’t have any questions yet.  I’m still processing the information.  I mean, I know what questions I want to ask, but I’m not ready to ask them yet. I have to think about them first.

I go home and look stuff up on the internets (which is always horrifying.)   I cry a little bit about the possibility that my twins will be born tiny and struggling instead of strong and healthy.

After a day or two, I am able to explain to myself all the statistical reasons why my babies will be fine.  I make out a list of questions to ask my doctor and obsess over those questions and what the answers might be for the weeks until my next appointment.

I wear my friends out talking over and over about whats going on inside me.

Sometimes I even end up calling the doctor extra, like when I had a week of the most terrible headaches in my life.  Turns out they were just tension headaches caused by hormones and there are a lot more hormones boiling around inside me right now because of 2 babies instead of 1.  That tends to be the answer for most everything.  “well there are 2 babies this time.  That means twice as much hormones/tiredness/ect.”

I think I am doing a pretty good job of not worrying about things I have no control over- like whether that wiggly twin B is going start hogging all the nutrients his brother needs.  Or whether Twin A is still alive in there, because I don’t feel him moving as often.  But I never forget that I’m having twins.  Mostly because I’m so extra tired.  Walking down my hall makes me feel like I just ran 2 miles.

I’m totally excited about having cute identical boys running around.  Bow Ties are going to happen.

I’m also very trepidatious about what it will be like to care for two newborns at once.  What it will be like to chase after two mischevious little boys, who will no doubt gang up on me and cause all kinds of mayhem and destruction.

It’s gonna be good.

20 minute Maternity Jeans

21 Sep

These are things I’m really wanting to buy right now.

Dansco Clogs

Sofft Black Heels

Simply Vera, Vera Wang earings

However, what I NEED is Maternity Jeans. I have lots of maternity capri pants but
#1 it isn’t sandal/flip flop weather any more and I look dorky in sneakers & capris

#2 I am preggo enough that I don’t care to shave my legs any more.

But Bubba needs new jeans too–more than I do. So it’s the old sewing machine and helpful online tutorials for me. Yay.

This tutorial on Craftster is the best maternity jean tutorial I’ve seen. It took me 20 minutes from start to finish and that included the time I took to find the jeans, dig out an old t-shirt and thread, and get my sewing machine out of storage–where it has been banished while I’m in DIQ!!

Here is my result! I’m so proud!! Retail therapy is great, but the self-fulfillment that comes from making something useful out of stuff you already had is much more lasting.

1 Tutorial from Craftster. I *heart* Craftster!!

1 pair $7 clearance jeans from Lane Bryant that I was only skinny enough to wear for about a month. Perhaps they shrunk in the wash?

1 old t-shirt generously, albeit unknowingly, donated by my DH.

ha ha just kidding. I used my own shirt. I had one that was really too small that had a good lycra content for stretchy but firm.

1 bit of thread, scissors and my handy dandy Bernina 1008.

I did 2 things differently from the tutorial.
#1 I didn’t have to sew the zipper shut because I couldn’t zip it even 1/4″. I just cut the whole zipper out. I also didn’t cut off any of the jeans waist band in the back. They were low rise jeans and I wanted the belt loops. Just because.

**note scissors do not cut through rivets–even if they are gingers. The sewing machine needle will not penetrate rivets either.

#2 I made sure to cut the strip from the bottom of the t-shirt so I didn’t have to roll the edge and hem it. Duh! I also cut it wider than 6″ because I like the full belly coverage better.

Then after I finished sewing, I went to my friend’s house this morning and she loaned me more maternity pants, including a dressy black pair. It’s all I ever wished for. Life is good.

Protien is my Friend

9 May

I have to share this in case it will help someone else too!!

So I’ve been murderously morning sick for about 3 weeks now (It seems longer.) I know there are women who get much sicker than I do, which is small consolation. I don’t actually throw up ever. I just feel like I’m about to all day long. Like being very car sick all the time.

It’s really hard to make myself do things like clean the house when all I want to do is lay on the couch and moan,”I’m so ill, I can hardly speak.” (name that movie)

Tuesday the man of the house felt sorry for me and grilled steak for dinner so I wouldn’t have to cook. (Perhaps he felt sorry for himself, too. Meals I cook when I’m feeling like ralfing don’t often end up tasting very good.)

Anyway, all Tuesday evening after eating a big steak, I felt amazingly well. Wednesday morning, I wondered to myself, “Was it the steak?” So I had a bit of leftover meat at about 9 am. I felt pretty good for most of the day.

Eureka! I sure wish I’d figured this out 5 or 6 pregnancies ago. But I’ll take it! I can’t eat steak every day, but I do have eggs (Which I can eat if I don’t think about eating them first. I just tell myself, “I’m cooking these for the Man and the kids.” Then suddenly they are on my plate and disguised with a little ketchup and some fried potatoes and I can get them down.) And I’ve got protein powder (non flavored) that I can add to things like milkshakes and soup and oatmeal. It is a little tricky, because what I feel like eating is mashed potatoes and frosted flakes and ice cream and veggie soup. But those things don’t make me feel better.

So I’ve gone from feeling awful to only feeling mostly tired and vaguely queasy once in a while. I can actually function without having to drag myself about layering on the guilt to force myself to keep moving. I’m happy. My new motivation does not extend to finding pictures for this post.