Marvelous Pigs in Satin

Okay, so I tried being super. Which really isn’t unusual for me. Those are the things I always try to do.

But remember that Adam Sandler movie where he gets a remote that can rewind & fast forward life?

I just want to get that remote and put my life on pause until the DH comes home.

**Insert Picture of Zombie Lady here**

Only I realize that I will waste a large portion of my life and be a bad mom if I do that.

So I keep trying to keep going.

But sometimes it sucks.

At least I fixed my vacuum today. So it sucks!

And guess what? I took a quiz and

Twilight Quiz » QuizRocket.com’s fun quizzes!

You are beautiful beyond measure — the envy of every girl. Your loyalty to your family is as fierce as your sense in fashion. You love your family very much, and wish you could have your own one day.
*********
Which just goes to show how psycho and unbalanced I am right now.

…..

But wait!

I am gorgeous

and value having children

and can be very cold to people that I view as a threat to my family.

I guess it’s true.

I’m Rosalee

At least I’m not Bella.

Can I still have Edward?

p.s. I had to say no to a murderous # of adds to get my results on this quiz, so I don’t recommend it. But since I clicked so many times to get it, I posted it anyway.

So my cousin over at Merrie Melody tagged me. I suspect foul play because she has a cute bag and it is pretty clean. Mine on the other hand is frightening. But I am being a good sport. So here are the rules:

1) Post a picture of whatever bag you are carrying at this moment. No going up to your closet to pull out that cute one you use for special occasions. I want to see what you carried today or the last time you left the house.

2)I want to know how much it cost. This is not to judge. It is purely for entertainment. So spill it. If there is a story that goes along with how you obtained it, I’d love to hear it!

3)Tag some peeps then link back here so people know why the heck you’re showing all your bag business!

Right. So there’s my bag. I got it free at the hospital 4 1/2 months ago when Julia was born. It was full of baby formula samples (the evil formula company trying to undermine breast feeding Moms) and coupons for diapers and the like.

Being a Mary Kay Lady, I have a lot of bags, and many of them are cuter than this one. However, about 3 weeks ago, I realized that I had 5 different bags that I was using as a diaper bag/purse. I could never find anything because I had to check all 5 to find it. So, I dumped them all out and made the decision that this bag was to be THE diaper bag.

Currently, my diaper bag is holding all this junk:

the junk can be classified as follows:

Baby stuff: a diaper, case of baby wipes, 2 foil packets desitin (though I much prefer using this stuff.), comb, saline nasal spray & nose sucker bulby thing, baby nail clippers, sunday tights, a lone baby sock

Momma stuff: zebra wallet (yes, one cool thing in the bag!), nursing pads, lanolin salve, chapstick, maxi pad, foil packet of prep H, lipstick compact, lysol disinfectant spray, pink planner for MK appointments, hair scrunchie, hair clip, check book, both sets of keys to my van, Relief Society phone book, pen

Random stuff that needs to be put elswhere: the boy’s tie from sunday, a broken diva bracelet, some rubber bands and a paper clip, left over postcard invitations from my last Mary Kay event, a DVD (Stuart Little 2), a rubber spatula, various reciepts & coupons, a Hello Kitty coloring book, actual trash, a diva corset from the princess birthday party (also where the bracelet came from, two cards with information about the Mormon Tabernacle Choir concert in Kansas City, 2 pencils, empty ziplock bag

Yeah. Don’t worry. My purse is a reflection of my house cleaning skills. Isn’t that scary

I am not super.

Well, my DH left today for Officer Candidate School. He will be gone for 8 weeks. So I am sad and lonely. But I am only allowing myself to wallow for tonight. Then tomorrow, I must become SuperMom/SuperHouseCleaningLady/SuperMaryKayLady/SuperYoungWomensLeader/SuperQuiltingLady/SuperTakesDinnerToHerSisterWithANewBabyLady/SuperOnADietLadyWhoWillSoonWeigh30PoundsLess

and stay so busy that I don’t have time to think about how long he is gone for.

P.S. Yes, I do consider Mom and Cleaning House to be 2 separate and distinct jobs.
P.P.S. Just to put off going to bed alone, I will share with you my most fabulous breadstick recipe. Don’t lie to yourselves. Breadsticks are food for the gods.

Easiest, Yummiest Cinnamon Breadsticks ever:

Easiest, Yummiest Garlic Parmesan Breadsticks ever

Dough: (this is the bread dough recipe that I have memorized. THerefore I use it for every bread-like recipe because I know it works and it saves me the time of looking up recipes.)

3 cups warm water
2 Tbsp active dry yeast
1/2 sugar or 1/3 cup honey
1/4 cup oil
1 1/2 Tbs salt
5 cups Whole Wheat Flour
3-4 cups All Purpose Flour

Dissolve the yeast in the water (if you have instant yeast instead, mix it with the flour). Add the rest of the ingredients in the order listed. I mix it in my KitchenAid. Use enough flour that the dough no longer sticks to the sides of the bowl. Knead 10 minutes. Cover with a cloth and let rise for about an hour. 40 minutes is good in the summer when the temperature is hot.

Grease 2 heavy cookie sheets with Shortening or butter. Use a lot. I prefer the shortening at this step because it won’t burn as easily as butter. Don’t worry, we get to the butter later.

Divide the dough into 2 balls. Roll one ball out on a cookie sheet.

Melt 1/4 cup of butter (1/2 stick)
Spread it over the dough.
Sprinkle GENEROUSLY with sugar and cinnamon

OR (decisions, decisions!!!)

Melt 1/4 cup of butter
Spread it over the dough
Sprinkle GENEROUSLY with garlic powder and parmesan cheese.

Better yet, do one pan of each.

Allow dough to rise for 40 minutes to an hour.
Use a pizza cutter to cut the dough into strips (see picture)
Bake at 400 degrees for 15-20 minutes

I suggest you double the recipe. One pan of each is just not enough.